Anticipation

The snow is practically gone now in Indiana. 

Sure, it will probably snow again... winter's last gasp... but for the most part, I think the worst has come to an end.

As I breathe in the brisk March air, moistened with the taste of melted snow, certain emotions and memories are triggered... those of anticipation! I think of the excitement I had as a little boy at the idea of being able to play football again outside! I remember the anticipation I had for school to be out for the summer. I remember looking forward to long, warm days hanging out with my friends. 

I guess not that much has changed... I still get excited when spring arrives. Now, however, when the breath of spring floods my lungs, I anticipate different things.

I anticipate graduation...

my first job as a pastor...

getting married someday...

having a family...

But with anticipation comes the fear of disappointment: 

What if I'm delayed in graduating?

What if I'm a failure as a pastor?

...as a husband?

...as a father?

...as a human being?

I worry because I have been let down before...

I know what it feels like when the hopes I had in me die...

and the strongest anticipation always seems to turn into the most heart-wrenching disappointment. 

And when we feel that pain...

we will usually do anything to avoid it again.

No anticipation, no disappointment.

Our anticipations usually let us down because this world is broken. 

But what if there is a day still coming when the brokenness will melt away like snow? What if all this deadness that I feel in my heart could be made alive again? What if a day is coming when we will never be disappointed again? What if there is such a thing as resurrection?

Is that not what we look forward to? The Day of the Lord? Resurrection? Eternal life? Is it safe to say that we have something huge to look forward to? 

Like that first time when you see the grass poking through the snow after a long winter, the empty tomb is a sign of our anticipation of something better: the day when our salvation is made complete. And that is one anticipation that I cannot and will not give up, no matter how much the disappointment may hurt. It is only temporary, after all. The snow may still oppress us now, but these winter days are numbered. Christ is coming back; the kingdom of God is at hand!

So go ahead and get your hopes up, because this is one anticipation that will not end in disappointment. As for today, let the spring air be a reminder that we have something to look forward to.

Perhaps that is why Easter is in the spring.